Blessed assurance

     I know that trusting God with your entire life is scary. It wasn't something I was ever eager to do, but it ended up being the best decision I've ever made. It gets SO exhausting choosing between God and a certain desire over, and over again. At the time you think it's an impossible choice, but then when you look back you're like "why didn't I do this sooner?"

     The best part is that no matter how many times you reject God, it means nothing. Paul is a great example of this. He wanted nothing to do with God and even killed people who loved Him. Did that change the way God felt about Paul? Nope. Unconditional love means that no matter what happens, you will continue to love that person. It doesn't matter if they lie, cheat, steal, or break your heart a million times, you are still going to love them exactly the same way.

     When I was younger, I thought love was a feeling. Then after loosing that feeling several times, I thought love was a decision, like when you get married. But after looking at the way God loves us, I've realized that love is our reason for existence. It's who we are. If we were not capable of love, there would be no point to life. We were created to worship, praise, and glorify God. 

     If we are not fulfilling our purpose, then we obviously aren't happy so we turn to anything and everything to try and fill that void. Whether its booze, friends, jobs, sororities, school, or guys, if that thing isn't Jesus, you will continue to feel frustrated and alone. You will feel like you can't trust anyone, that everyone is judging you, and that nobody understands you. Confidence in Christ can fix all of these things and its only when you trust God completely with your whole life that you start to see things differently in a new and marvelous light.
1 Peter 2:9

Beautifully and wonderfully made

    Love is something that God freely gives us. No matter what we do, He will never stop loving us. His love for us is unconditional, which means we could do anything in the world to defy Him and He would not love us less. Real love is something that sacrifices and sometimes it can result in the ultimate sacrifice. Life.
     Recently someone I knew said their family member tried to commitment suicide and I started thinking about how that person must feel. I wondered how desperate they must be to find what they are missing. It saddened me greatly, because I knew what they were missing.
    When there is a void, a unhappiness, a feeling that something is missing...that is every humans longing to be with their creator. You see God made us so without Him we feel empty and unhappy. Without a deep and meaningful relationship with Him, we find life meaningless and without joy. Only when we find our reason for existence can life actually feel content and worth living.
    I know it is hard to imagine Gods love. I have struggled wrapping my mind around this concept, but I find that reading what God said about His love for us helps. The Bible says that He loved us so much that He sent His only son to die for our sins. He made us in His image, He knit us together in our mothers womb, and He knows every single hair on our heads. There is NO ONE on this planet that can say that for another person. The love that a Shepard, Master, and Creator has for His children is infinite. Not the curse of sin, the flames of hell, or the cunningness of the enemy can weaken it.

Grace to me

    Grace is what God showers us in everyday. It is the very thing that can save our souls from an eternity of fire. Without it, I can't even begin to comprehend how hard life would be. For example, when I think about how I use to live my life, I get very nauseous. I begin to imagine how Gods wrath could affect me and I experience indescribable emotions.
    I remember when I had a similar experience during the summer while attending an Episcopal Church service and taking communion. As I was sitting there waiting for my turn, I suddenly realized that every wrong thing I had ever did were the very things that nailed Jesus to the cross. My disgusting, unnecessary sin nailed a perfect and holy being to a tree; the son of God to a tree! I immediately felt sick to my stomach and I could barely walk up to the alter.
    I think the moments when you realize how much you need Gods grace and you physically feel ill from all the wrong you have done, are the prefect moments to get on the ground and cry out to God. Tell Him you are sorry, ask for His forgiveness, and begin to experience the grace that we would all be lost without.